Thursday, August 29, 2013

We have all heard the “it takes a village” theory of parenting.  Now I am going to introduce you to an old radical theory made new again.   It does not take a village; it takes loving parents with a view of the end game in mind.  

Ever aware of the parenting culture, I have become increasingly angry at what has now become a complete coddle culture.  The concept of consequences for your actions has gone largely by the wayside.   I don’t want my child sick, but if he plays outside and get’s dirty….. Guess what …. He washes.   I don’t eradicate every germ that comes into my home; as a result, I have a child with a great immune system. (Even though we are homeschooling)  There are times when I have wanted to be that overprotective parent, but I fight it, because I know what is best for him is to learn to be a productive healthy member of society. Consequences for your actions and taking responsibility for your mistakes and wrongs - these are the important lessons a parent must teach.  The things that made our country strong.  It seems to me that the more affluent our society the more coddled the youth.

Parents have been trained to the “village” mode and figure it is the governments responsibility to teach our kids, to keep them safe, even to teach them about their bodies.  I was one of the masses, my older girls went to school and I was involved, but not really.   They learned, and I accepted what they were learning was true.  After all the people teaching them have degrees, they must know betting than little old me.  

I have learned that my job as a parent is to raise a productive member of society.  That it is my husband and I who should have the most influence.  It is our job to teach morals, ethics and standards.  A big part of that is to model correct behavior.  Helping others, personally not just with a donation, is a big part of this.   A good marriage/relationship with your spouse is another.   Teaching tolerance and understanding for people who are different.   Also, and this is a big one, letting them know shame and disappointment.   Not everyone gets a trophy; sometimes you lose the game.  You lie, cheat, or steal and you will be punished.   None of this ‘time out’ stuff either; the punishment fits the crime.   Trust can be broken and rebuilt, and cheating and lying are not an option.  

It is scary, that moment when you take personal responsibility for your child and their behavior.   No blaming society or the schools when there are issues.   No blaming MSG or Global Warming.   The responsibility for who your child is belongs in your home.  Teaching responsibility and empathy are your job.  This is a mission that should not be undertaken lightly; it is the very foundation of the future of our race.

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